In my opinion, trust, respect, and love are the three imperative aspects of a functional relationship. Without even one of these, a relationship is doomed to fail. Yes, that’s a pretty hefty claim to make right off the bat, but bear with me… At 22 years of age, I’ve had time to witness and experience what true love is, and what love is not.
I’ve written about the concept of love in the past; partially because it fascinates me, but also because it’s raw, incessant power will hold me forever in awe. Trust and respect are two topics that stood out as incredibly pertinent as well.
Trust is a biggie. I am a person that DOES NOT easily trust others. I used to be a more trustful person, and gave my trust away much more readily. However, now I am more reserved and do not give 100% of my trust to anyone (that is, until I met Josh.)
I feel that trust must be earned, and once it’s lost, it’s nearly impossible to regain.
In a relationship, trust is undeniably the cornerstone. Without trust, how could you possibly respect, or even love, your partner? The answer is simple, you can’t.
So how does someone “earn” trust? I watched a rather odd movie this evening called, The Pill. Quick synopsis of the film: guy is unhappy in current relationship, guy goes to bar, guy meets a different woman, guy goes home with woman (let’s name her Mindy), guy has unprotected sex with Mindy, Mindy is not on birth control, panic ensues, guy tries to balance old relationship and trying to get Mindy to take the morning after pill, Mindy finds out guy has a girlfriend, guy is kicked out of Mindy’s apt, guy breaks up with girlfriend, guy is alone, boohoo.
The movie was littered with people lying to one another and lying to themselves. It was rather sickening, and made every situation 100% more complicated (but hey, it’s Hollywood.)
I think the purest form of innocence is found in a genuine sense of wonder and admiration.
- Staring at a brilliant display of colors in a sunset
- Watching a butterfly hatch out of its cocoon
- Standing at the oceans edge
- Watching Olympic athletes compete in their respective sports
It’s an amazing thing when you’re able to evoke similar feelings with significant other. Yes, that sounds incredibly sappy, but to an extent it’s very true. When I listen to Josh talk
about his day, or the way he lights up when showing me his fancy excel spreadsheets, or talking about the fantasy football roster. I have this inexplicable sense of wonder when listening him talk about something that’s important to him.
It’s also very easy to respect a man that’s a natural leader, like my Josh is. He makes me want to be a better person. He knows me better than I know myself. He wants what’s best for me, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that he respects me as well. He completes the part of me I never knew was missing to begin with.
Ephesians 5:33 “However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”
What a privilege it is to be loved by someone that you love so deeply in return. I’ve never been as much in love as I am in with Josh before. Although it’s exciting and wonderful and everything, it’s also somewhat terrifying. 21 months ago I didn’t even know he existed, yet now he’s my other half.
One of my favorite things about our relationship is that we have almost daily “dates.”
Our”date” could consist of something as simple as going to get the mail, or it could be a little more elaborate like getting all gussied up to go out. I love how he makes “dates” out of the simplest things. I’m pretty easy to please, but he consistently surprises me with his knack for creative dates.
If you’ve never taken the Love Language‘s quiz, stop reading and TAKE IT NOW. Josh and I took it and discovered that his top two languages are Acts of Service and Quality Time, while mine are Physical Touch and Acts of Service. (I’ll write more on that later…)
So in conclusion, without trust, respect, and love, there is not relationship. I’m eternally thankful for the perfect model of how love works as demonstrated by my sweet Jesus, and am forever grateful for the incredible gift of my Josh while here on earth.